What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Randomize
