I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
you will always have a special place in my vag
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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