i just wanna soil my oats bro
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
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