I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
