So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
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