I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
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There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
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All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
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