Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Randomize
