You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
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