I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
wow bdsm is so cute
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
