He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
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