Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Two words: blizzard sex
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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