My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
