Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
