Can i not drive my cunt home
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
