True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
