Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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