He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
