jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
