you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Randomize
