I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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