Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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