the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
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