This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
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