At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
