just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
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