she was so not down for the gang bang
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
