rhymes with "ouble enetration"
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
Randomize