And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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