Me. At least after what I've been through.
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
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