I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Randomize
