Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
