LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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