God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.