We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize