My brain says no but my pants say off.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize
