I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
i think my mom watched the whole time
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize