someone threw a dead crab at me
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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