you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Randomize
