Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
