i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
