Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Randomize