listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
