It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize