just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Randomize
