so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
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