you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
