That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
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