Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Randomize
