He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
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