i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
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