i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Randomize
