i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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