Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
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